A Faux Karen

I am a Faux Karen. All too often I contend with being considered “entitled, demanding, and prone to escalating minor disputes”.

I am discovering that it is very challenging to enjoy “the time I have left” when confronted with less than helpful “care” in a health care setting, when the possible outcome is my own death, or permanent brain damage.

Since dealing with the cataract prescription fiasco, being prescribed a drug containing a preservative that is predicted to kill me, I have gone into an induced state of denial. As I have been waiting for the situation to play out, waiting for more information, waiting for all the parties to have all the files. I have not allowed myself to think about this very dangerous situation I find myself in.

Yesterday I received a call from the surgeon’s office, to set up the date for the second cataract surgery. The call came from the person who co-ordinates the surgeries.

That is the person that I was previously told would call me with the name of the pill that would be given at the time of surgery. That call never came. There was no record of the former request, in fact this person told me yesterday that they didn’t know anything about a pill used at the time of surgery.

They also told me yesterday that they have no record of the information forwarded to them by the Patient Experience Specialist at the hospital where the surgery will be performed. Was it sent? Did they receive it? Did they trash it when it arrived? Does the person who called me not have access to all of the files?

To say the surgeon’s office structure is not equipped for my particular special needs is an understatement… despite the signs in the office saying “we take allergies seriously”. Seriously!

I explained that I am very frightened, that I want to research the drugs used before the surgery so that I could be relaxed for the surgery. The co-coordinator said they would talk to the surgeon today about my request to know what the pill was, and the manufacturer as different manufacturers use different preservatives. I asked her to call me back to let me know how it went, what the surgeon advised. Honestly, the way this is going, I do not expect to receive a call, I don’t expect that there will ever be any acknowledgement that I made the request for the information.

The co-coordinator informed me that my first eye surgery will be done by the surgeon, but that surgeon will not perform the surgery on the second eye because they will be away on maternity leave. The replacement surgeon has good reviews on their skills, mixed on bedside manner. I don’t care about the bedside manner, as long as they competently do what they need to do keep me alive, and do a good job on my eyes.

All surgery is a bit of a horror show for me, due to the issues of anaphylaxis, allergic to preservatives, which are non-medicinal ingredients in many drugs used to treat patients. On at least three occasions I’ve avoided death only because I’ve been conscious and very very assertive as I was about to be injected with a lethal dose of some drug or other with a dangerous preservative. And once I was injected with such a drug and waited on the dentist’s chair to die… which I obviously did not do. That was quite an experience, for everyone in the room. It was most intense for me though, the person who dies is always the one with the worst outcome in these kinds of situations.

Although I held hopes, the dentist felt it might not indicate that the allergy was gone, it just might not have been the normal amount of preservative in the shot. We were all quite relieved when I didn’t die. I was sent home with a preservative free syringe of epinephrine, just in case. Thankfully I didn’t need it.

Human error is very common in my experiences with the medical world. I have been successful in spotting it and dodging it for over 42 years, my luck could run out anytime.

I wear a medic alert bracelet, and not once has a medical person, nurse or doctor, looked at it. If I am not conscious to advocate for myself I pray they will have a look!

I can tell you that the majority of people who make the human errors do not respond in a positive manner when it is pointed out to them. I don’t have a choice, I must point it out to them.

I have plenty of drama in my life just trying to live out my God given life span.

I have done, and am doing, everything I can to try to ensure my safety.

Yesterday, and today, I have not managed to get back into the induced state of denial.

I still have weeks until the surgery, they may be my last. I am aiming at induced denial so that I will enjoy them as much as is possible.

Worldly

Weather

22°C
Date: 2:00 PM EDT Friday 24 July 2026
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Quote

“It’s a dangerous business going out your front door.”
The Fellowship of the Ring
J. R. R. Tolkien
1892 – 1973

14 Comments
Steve Paul Simms
Steve Paul Simms
14 days ago

Hang in, sister. You’ve got a few more triumphs in you. Love, SP

WendyNC
WendyNC
14 days ago

Yep, sticky note on the forehead. And write on pieces of paper tape “X ALLERGY -ANAPHYLACTIC SHOCK” and put them around your arms just above the elbow and around each wrist–or anywhere else they’re likely to stick a needle in you.

For pills, I figure you have to be conscious to take them and can make the appropriate noises.

I don’t know how the Canadian system works. Here, if I were dealing with something like your allergy, I’d insist on a consult with the hospital/surgical center pharmacist beforehand to further document your allergy and your request for review of all medications and anesthetics.

If money weren’t tight, I’d encourage you to consult an attorney in advance, just so you could also get put in your record “XXX XXX is my attorney and will promptly pursue all remedies at law available if I am incorrectly given any drug containing X as a preservative.”

Hey, I can go over the top with the best of them. 😉

Teri
Teri
14 days ago

I talked to DH. He said he was not given a pill before cataract surgery. He said they don’t want anything in your stomach. They did put something in his IV to relax him and they give you a local anesthetic to numb the eye.

If this is true, there’s no point in talking to the surgeon, Maggie. As I said before, you need to talk to the anethetist/anesthesiologist.

DH hopes this will help your anxiety: Fortunately, you will be in a hospital, not a dentist’s chair. Hospitals are equipped for these kinds of allergic reactions.

Sending hugs.

Last edited 14 days ago by Teri
Teri
Teri
12 days ago
Reply to  Maggie Turner

This is DH’s comment. Your doctor says talk to the hospital. They are right, so far as it goes. The anesthesiologist is employed by the hospital and is the one who will be handling the drugs you are given.

Now from me. Maggie, I implore you. For your own safety, talk to the hospital and insist on speaking to the anesthesiologist. You have valid reason – as you know – to insist on this. Before the surgery, the anesthesiologist always comes to you and introduces themselves. Since they take their job seriously enough to introduce themselves, I would hope they would be willing to speak to you.

If it were me, I would talk to the anesthesiologist face-to-face. It’s easy to discount a faceless person on a telephone. Not as easy to discount a warm body telling you about their anaphylaxis.

Teri
Teri
12 days ago
Reply to  Maggie Turner

I did a google search and apparently since (supposedly) only “eye-numbing drops” are used for the surgery the province does not require an anesthesiologist, per se. They may have, though, an anesthetist nurse or an assistant. Sadly, the answer also said, or no one at all.

When DH had his surgery, they actually injected a local into his eye, rather than using drops.

I hope you can get the answers and the support that you need.

Kate
Kate
13 days ago

A constant danger you live with, Maggie, exacerbated at times like this. I’m sorry. I also will remember your vigilance and energy in dealing with it. You set a good example.

Teri
Teri
12 days ago
Reply to  Maggie Turner

Yes, calm and logic are necessary when talking to the anesthesiologist. And bring any proof you can of your allergy.