Sometimes life just bubbles up out of the deep. I am not referring to the day-to-day stuff of life, the psychic space that is outside-in, that occupies almost every waking hour, and has its own measure of pleasure.
Of what I speak is the inside-out experience, when what is inside you reaches out to the world, with its eyes, ears and arms wide open.
Today I find myself smiling for no apparent reason. Objects and scenery have suddenly broken through the everyday to reveal their inner beauty. Each snowflake falling outside the window, falls just for me. Every sound wave making its way through the atmosphere sways, in harmony with my song. The universe that lies outside human artiface has opened wide its gates. I have passed into this place where absolute insignificance and infinite worth merge.
Nothing in my life is as valuable to me as this experience.
I wonder if the human cultures that existed before recorded history allowed humans to feel this way about being alive, as a matter of course. It seems to me that as a species we have lost our way to ourselves.
At the same time, the outside-in world continues to turn.
I enjoy my work, but not everyday and all the time, just every day and most of the time.
Attila has recovered fully from his hernia surgery. He is busy with the house, finishing off little bits of the masonry heater floor project.
The masonry heater project took great strides the weekend before Christmas when Lares brought his tools and worked with Attila, to lay ceramic tile on the bare subfloor around the permiter of the heater. When Terra asked me in the fall what I wanted for Christmas, there was no doubt in my mind. I wanted a finished floor. Even more wonderful than having a new floor laid, was getting to spend time with Terra and Lares.
Luna has been reunited with Janus, he returned from England in December. Luna called us the day he returned, I have never heard her sound so happy.
On the home front, our bread machine broke down in the fall, a belt had stretched over the many years of constant use. We had purchased a spare belt for it many years ago, but were unable to find the part after the chaos of our move to this house.
Nothing for it but to order another, which I did. It finally arrived by courier on Friday. This morning Attila tore the machine apart, and replaced the old belt with the new. I christened the machine by baking a loaf of whole wheat bread. The machine is churning away in the corner as I write; pizza is possible once again!
As I busied myself preparing the pizza crust, a bright light caught my eye. I turned towards the oven, which I had set to preheat, to see bright white sparks arcing through the oven cavity. I immediately turned off the oven. The oven element had melted, caught fire and shorted out.
Pizza preparation is past the point of no return. Hence, we are forging on. Attila has lit the little woodstove downstairs, and we will bake the pizza on the top surface. It might work, but then again, we may be opening a can of beans for dinner tonight!
|RECIPES :: Cast
Outside from the inside.
By the Easy Chair
Guide Book & Atlas of Muskoka and Parry Sound Districts 1879
Text by W. E. Hamilton
"From a Distance"
Written by Julie Gold
Performed by Nanci Griffith
Temperature -5 °C
Pressure 100.6 kPa
Visibility 8 km
Humidity 91 %
Wind Chill -8
Dewpoint -6 °C
Wind ESE 9 km/h
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