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Things
are pretty slow here. I worked for two
and half hours this week, nothing else
on offer. The wage earned will cover
the cost of the gas used to get there
and back, but not the cost of the vehicle;
financially it is not much of a job
and not sustainable in the long run. I
am not allowed to apply for a position
with regular hours until a six month
probationary period has been successfully
navigated. It remains to be seen if
I can support the costs of the job
until the end of the probationary period. If I contort my thoughts, twist my emotions, I can actually make myself feel sorry for the people around me who complain about having to go to work at paying jobs. Funny old world. As a statistic I look good, as I am "working". The losing money part does not interest the statisticians or the politicians; my real quality of life is not measured. I notice that my mood improves if I get close to a day's work a week; my mood slides when I don't get enough hours to break even. I have a lot of time to think about this, which is not a good thing either. So, the winter blahs are edging into my everyday life again. I'm fighting hard to maintain a balance and winning for the most part. Well, actually, I thought I was doing very well, until my digestive system sent out a distress call. Apparently my digestive system is suffering from an excess in acid, the doctor feels is due to stress. I am on a round of medication, it helps with the pain, and I have tests booked at the hospital to ensure that it is only an ulcer and not something more serious. I think the stress of chronic isolation and unemployment are taking their toll on my health. Terra and Lares are coming to visit. We always have a wonderful time when they visit, I'm sure it will lift my spirits immeasurably. The research on my family genealogy book is proceeding at breakneck speed. The new high speed internet connection can be thanked for that! What used to take two or three minutes to load, now takes two or three seconds. My days drift by pleasantly, despite the disconnection with the functioning economic world, which seems to be the only populated world. |
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